Everyone a Commentator

In the last 24 hours I had at least 3 encounters with Israeli society that underscore the fact that everyone here is a commentator, and your business is everyone's business. Those who only visit Israel find this charming and endearing. Those who have lived here a short time find it annoying, even infuriating. Those who live here a long time come to accept it and largely ignore it. After all, if the average Israeli acts like he thinks he is a member of my family, I can employ my years of experience ignoring family members when they do something annoying.

1) Yesterday I went to a supermarket intending to buy some things, but wound up only getting two items. I went to the inappropriately named express line (10 items or less) with my two items in a shopping cart. There were four people ahead of me, including three older women. The cashier was engaged in an argument with the person checking out, and the women were chiming in. I'm not sure what they were arguing about, but then again, it's possible they weren't sure what they were arguing about, either. Suddenly the cashier spotted me in the back of the line with a shopping cart and yelled at me that the line was only for those with ten items or less. I replied that I only had two items, but before I could even get the words out of my mouth the three women started screaming back at the cashier on my behalf. This went on for several minutes as the security guard looked on with a bemused smile from his seat at the exit. All in a day's work.

2) Today on the bus a mentally ill old man I have seen before got on and complained that an old woman's shopping cart was in his way in the aisle. It was not -- there was plenty of room for him to pass. Nevertheless, the woman folded it up, leaving about 85% of the aisle available for him to pass. He continued to make loud noises and gesture angrily (he seemed incapable of speech). The woman kept saying there was room for him to pass, but also pulled the cart as close to her as possible until he finally passed. Then the woman proceeded to engage all those around her in a loud defense of herself. Mind you, no one criticized the woman, and people reassured her that the man was not well and she did nothing wrong. Nevertheless, she continued to adamantly defend herself, just to be sure. She must have once represented Israel at the UN.

3) I was standing at a street corner waiting for the light to change and twice a gust of wind almost knocked off my yarmulka. A guy waiting next to me also had to grab his yarmulka. He then remarked to me that we didn't have enough hair to keep it clipped on tightly. That's not exactly what I needed to hear to brighten up my day, and really not something you should tell someone on a first date.

G'mar Chasima Tova.